I Just Need To Catch My Breath, Christmas By Myself This Year

“Bah, humbug!” No, that’s too strong
‘Cause it is my favorite holiday
But all this year’s been a busy blur
Don’t think I have the energy

To add to my already mad rush
Just ’cause it’s ’tis the season.
The perfect gift for me would be
Completions and connections left from last year.

Never before has the Christmas season flown by with such little gusto. Christmas is three days away and it feels like any other weekend, the only difference being the fact that I am stuck on the couch suffering through what is most likely mono. Fortunately, my untimely illness has afforded me some much needed rest and relaxation. For the first time all year, I have time to myself and no pressure to get anything done or to please anybody and it feels marvelous.

The past twelve months have been quite the roller coaster, both personally and professionally. I spent the entire year climbing the ladder at work to ultimately resign my position at the beginning of December. After a semester in which I found myself extremely overwhelmed and severely underperforming, I made the decision to realign my priorities and focus on finishing my undergraduate degree as quickly as possible. I’ll be doing freelance theatre work to make ends meet while I finish my degree and, although I will miss retail management, I am looking forward to the measurable change of pace that my career change is going to bring.

Although I once again find myself in the same position in which I found myself two summers ago, I feel much better about my life this time. I no longer feel defined by my perceived lack of direction in my life. As I have grown older I have certainly grown wiser and am learning how to find balance and happiness amidst the madness.

Although 2012 brought many frustrations, failures and shortcomings there were also many accomplishments, much happiness and immeasurable personal growth. My horoscope insists that next year is going to be a non-remarkable “germinating period meant to prepare a much more remarkable future phase” and I’m totally okay with that.

One of my New Year’s Resolutions for 2013 is to write more; I’m good at it and I really enjoy it. I also will be placing increased emphasis on my personal health (now that I will actually have the time to care about such things!) and interpersonal relationships. 2013 is going to be able finding myself and not settling for less.

Let’s do it!